Are you married to an alcoholic or addict?
Do you think you’re married to an alcoholic or addict?
It’s scary and stressful when you’re married to an alcoholic, or an addict.
You become depressed and anxious, and sometimes it can feel hopeless.
You probably didn’t realize you were marrying an alcoholic at the time. Perhaps your spouse may not have been an alcoholic or addict when you married, because it’s a situation that’s developed over time.
What you can do to remedy the situation
The first thing you need to do is educate yourself on what alcoholism or addiction is. It’s a real, recognized disease.
No matter how many times you’ve begged or pleaded, you feel like your words are falling on deaf ears, and they are. So what can you do when you’re married to an alcoholic or an addict?
What happened to the person you fell in love with?
He or she still exists, and would never have wanted to fall into this cycle of addiction to alcohol or any substance abuse. There’s rarely any intention to harm you.
You are not alone
While you may feel as though you are completely alone in your marriage – it’s important to know that there are many other spouses and partners out there who are dealing with the same problems.
There are groups that offer guidance and support and the chance to connect with other people who understand what you’re going through. Groups such as CoAnon or Alanon can help you to feel less isolated – and will help you learn how to live with a person who struggles with an addiction to alcohol.
Is alcohol a drug in liquid form?
Any mind altering substance that is not taken as prescribed by a medical practitioner or psychiatrist is considered “self medicating”.
In other words, alcohol is not prescribed and it changes your mood, so this is a drug in liquid form.
What is the impact of addiction on the emotional and physical spheres?
Alcohol abuse affects aspects of a person’s life beyond just the physical.
This could look like;
- Emotional and relationship problems
Noticeable weight loss and skin color changes - Trouble looking after their personal hygiene (not brushing teeth, showering, and not washing hair)
- Losing interest in things they used to enjoy
- Tardiness or poor work attendance
Failure to meet family obligations, making excuses to not attend family gatherings - Increase in risky behaviors and being too impulsive
Set Boundaries
Set healthy boundaries. it’s NOT okay to drink excessively and behave badly.
Everyone is different and only you know your own situation. Only you can choose when, or if to detach with love or leave the relationship. Know your limit and set a firm boundary. Whether it is financial lines, verbal or physical abuse – Abuse is never okay. Ever.
If you need help with setting boundaries, please speak to one of our addiction specialists.
Help for Alcoholics and Addicts
There are several ways to get help for an alcoholic. Especially since the Covid-19 and mutations have changed the world, you can get online counseling and therapy for the family.
The negative consequences will more than likely continue if your spouse or partner refuses treatment.
Treatment Options for your spouse who is an alcoholic or addict
Assessment or Discovery
An alcoholic should be assessed by a health professional — an addiction therapist or medical doctor who has formal training in addiction treatment.
During an assessment, the following criteria are evaluated. Each is important when deciding what types of treatment will offer the best support.
Factors to assess
- Alcohol and other drug use and previous treatment
- Drinking patterns or behaviors.
Other substance use issues. - The severity of alcohol or other drug problems.
Prior treatment (if any) and how it went.
Two Components of Treatment for AUD
The two main components of treatment are talk therapy and Medication.
The way to recovery from alcohol use disorder is different for each person. It mostly depends on how severe the alcohol abuse is, along with other individual needs and preferences.
The route is not always a straight line, and relapse and repeated attempts are not uncommon.
The actual progress in the long run is what matters.
Colleen
